lonelywhiteasian:

my dash is dead so i’m gonna liven it up with some fun, family-friendly text posts. let’s start this off, shall we? what’s brown and sticky?…. …. you guessed it…. … a stick! hahaha we’re all having fun here

sewphia:

10 years from now people are gonna ask me how my teenage years went and I will just start crying

shannananan:

mercimonamie:

i fell in love with him like ketchup falls out of a bottle: slowly, and then all at once.

oh my god you managed to one up john green.

boygrimlark:

scout-ebubbles:

docot:

freddybenson:

leovaldezstyle:

freddybenson:

A

B

C

the brazilian wandering spider’s venom can give you an erection lasting for hours

D

E

themustachedwaffle:

andiamburdenedwithgloriousfeels:

hi-john-im-alive:

One way

Or another

I’m gonna meetcha

I’m gonna

ust

*tour guide voice*

if you look to your right you’ll see a  relic from the event known simply as “Mishapocalpyse”